A new weekly column by Anika Sharma.  Every Sunday, starting today. 

They call me ‘happy’

Hi. My name is Anika and one of the words that people use to describe me is, ‘happy.’  Except I was not always like this. Like all of us, I went through my own ups and downs in life. There were times when I was so low and so down that I thought nothing could pull me out of the deep, dark chasm I found myself in. I was alone, scared with nowhere to go and very unhappy. Not to mention, lonely.

I wanted to run away but couldn’t. A mother to two very young kids and a dog, I knew they needed me and yet, there was nowhere I could really go with them in tow. You see, society is still very unforgiving of both women and men who want to get up and dare to think different. Depression and unhappiness are still seen as the privileges of the rich and those with a lot of time on their hands. Now couple that with PMS and post-partum depression and suddenly you have me – someone who did not even know what she was going through till she went through it.

The Mind-Body Connection

My mental state started to affect my body and I started getting sores in my armpits and my knees. The sores would not heal for weeks and months. To make matters worse, my back started getting so stiff that I had to literally be pulled out of bed!

I was in this state for many years, smiling and laughing through it all, because nobody wanted to hear otherwise, definitely not my side of the family.

An Epiphany

And then, on my annual trips to India, I met my MBA professor for coffee. Many years older than I, he looked younger, radiant, happier and just lighter on his feet. I asked him his secret and he said, “Anika, go do the Happiness Course. Don’t question it. Just do it.”

And so, I did. I did it as a birthday gift to myself. That was more than seven years ago and here I am. Happier.

The Small Things That Make a Huge Difference

So how am I different today? The ups and downs in my life are more or less the same. My family is the same. So why am I happier? Well, amongst other things, I discovered meditation, which I have gone on television to call one of the world’s greatest superpowers.

To be still amongst the assault of the everyday.

To accept people and circumstances for who and what they are.

And to receive every new day as a gift.

Gratitude Attitude

These are just some of the things that I learnt along the way. The more I went inwards, the more I became happier outwards and the more gratitude I felt for the small things in life. Small things such as wounds that heal, a back that now bends both with flexibility as well as with humility. The opportunity to see light, looking backwards at the chasm from which I was able to save myself.

I feel deep gratitude for my meditation teachers who taught me to be still and be mindful of what is going on around me, without the urge to partake in it. Gratitude for my kids and family, who have learnt to let me be still when I need it. Gratitude for the people who were there to lift me and carry me even when I was too proud to say I needed it.

And so here I am. Happier than I was many years ago and in deep gratitude for the journey that I have had along the way – adding depth to me like rings to a tree. I hope through this column I call ‘Anika’s Zen, the Power of Gratitude’, I can share what I have learnt through my journey and how the power of gratitude has helped me. And I hope you will share the same with me.

Read my blogs below:

• Anika’s Zen and the Power of Gratitude
• Sack Full of Breaths
• The Power of Silence: A Date with Myself
• Travel Through the Glass
• The Elusive Trophy
• The Joy of Everyday
• Does Love Have a Color?
• Stronger than the Storm
• My Neighborhood, My Tribe

Anika Sharma is a digital thought leader, a mother, a professor at New York University’s Stern School of Business. When she is not busy working or raising her two teenage children, you can find her planting herbs in her garden, meditating with her friends, swimming long laps or filling rooms with her cackling laughter. Email her at anikadas@gmail.com or on twitter

If you enjoyed this blog, read about the Many Benefits of Gratitude. and the Rules of Simple Living.

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