Teen Yoga Challenge

 

This summer, I was gifted with a unique opportunity. A mom in our neighboring suburb reached out to ask if I would be willing to teach teen yoga to 4 boys. 3 of them are 18 years of age and are going off to different colleges soon. The young men have been friends/classmates for several years.

The idea of teaching the 16-18 age group is daunting, to say the least. For one, I have no children of my own, so nothing to compare against. For another, I’ve had minimal to no interaction with our friends’ teenage kids. At parties, they all go off and huddle together, while adults make their own groups. As they reach teen years, they don’t even show up for parties, and when/if they do, they come for a bit, say hello and make a hasty departure.

In addition, I have never taught yoga to this age group/gender. I have taught little boys and girls between ages 6 and 12. I also teach older men. But not teen yoga, and that too boys. One yoga class series with a 14-year-old was fraught with issues, especially since she came against her will. The online classes and the pandemic didn’t help matters either. I tried hard but wasn’t able to make much headway with the teen.

No more teen yoga, I told myself.

 

Visualize to Realize

 

 

According to thesaurus, Visualize and Realize are semantically related. When we visualize how our life ahead will be, we are able to realize our dreams and get closer to our life’s goals – whatever they may be. With yoga becoming quite popular with star athletes and peak performers, including men, I decided to use this theme for our classes. I didn’t want to scare them away with terms like yoga, meditation and pranayama!

Every class (twice a week) was a theme centered around this phrase. Visualization is called Sankalpa in Sanskrit. It is a term frequently used in Yoga Nidra (yogic sleep) to create affirmations that the practitioner is able to visualize as their heartfelt desire – a vow that is envisaged as being true in the present moment.

 

Teen Yoga Benefits

 

The young men had a hectic and busy 2 years of school life. Pressure to do well, college applications, the anticipation, the wins and losses, the decision-making process – all play havoc on them in terms of physical/mental health, sleep and stress. Practicing mindfulness through yoga helps teens deal with their daily life stressors.

I have listed a few of the items that we worked on during our sessions:

 

Confidence

 

 

Our body posture says so much about our self-confidence. Most of us are slumped in chairs and ruin our posture over prolonged sitting on office chairs or on couches. When the teens walked into my studio, their shoulders were hunched, and their spines were curved. Their bodies are also developing physically at this age, bodies akimbo. Teaching postures like Mountain Pose (Tadasana) and Easy Seated Pose (Sukhasana) make them aware of their spine alignment. The chest is open, and the spine is tall. While the sitz bones are rooting down, the shoulders fall away from the ear lobes and the chin is level with the floor. The eyes are gazing softly and there is a genuine, gentle smile on the lips.

They learn how to stand, walk and sit with confidence with these tall, relaxed postures. When you physically look confident, it helps quell the butterflies in the stomach during periods of high stress like job interviews and tests.

 

Focus:

 

 

Today’s teens are bombarded with distractions. Text messages, emails, social media, news, phone calls are the name of the game. Their attention is disrupted by external stimuli, and some find it hard to stay focused. Teen Yoga teaches them to bring their attention to their breath. By quietly observing their breath coming into the body and exiting the body (apa japa), kids can learn to keep their minds from diverting. Balancing yoga poses like Tree Pose (Vrikshasana), Warrior 3 (Veerabhadrasana 3) and Bird-Dog (Dandayamana Bharmanasana) helps them to bring their focus to the present moment.

We also discussed practical, real-life hacks like turning off their cell phones (or putting them into airplane mode) while doing homework, setting time on their calendars to work in 30-minute dedicated slots, going outdoors to clear their minds, getting a good night’s sleep, eating nourishing food etc.

 

Sympathy, Empathy & Compassion

 

 

We live in a world of gossip and hurt. Yoga allows teens to take a step back and re-evaluate their behaviors. When I asked the class if kindness was a sign of weakness, they all said ‘no’. Wow! These are wonderfully responsible future citizens.

I gave the boys a quiz that asked them to evaluate situations where sympathy, empathy and compassion were called for. Even I was not fully sure of the differences between the terms! To recap, while these words are near cousins, they are not synonymous with one another. Sympathy means you can understand what the person is feeling. The ability to feel someone else’s emotions and to look at things from their perspective (step in their shoes) is Empathy. Compassion is the willingness to relieve the suffering of another.

So, if someone lost their job, one would express sympathy by saying “I am so sorry you lost your job and experiencing hardship.”. One would express empathy by saying “I know what you are going through. My Aunt lost her job recently too.”. A compassionate person may say “I am sorry for your job loss. May I be of assistance by paying for your gas?”.

I took the test before giving it to them and got 3 out of 15 wrong. One young man got all right. I felt so thrilled and proud of my students!

 

Physical Strength & Flexibility

 

 

Yoga is a great complement to other teen sports – both individual and group. One of the teens is a runner, and another is a swimmer. The difference between a gym workout and a yoga work-in is that the latter uses the breath as a guide. We also hold asanas (poses) for an extended length of time to build stronger muscles, and a good core.

Asanas like Cat-Cow (Marjaryasana/Bitilasana), Chair (Utkatasana) improve posture and balance, strengthen and stretch the spine, neck, hips, abdomen and back. They are also useful to relieve stress and calm the mind. Down Dog (Adho mukha svanasana) elongates the spine, strengthens and opens the chest, strengthens the arms and opens the backs of the legs. The Sun Salutations (Surya namaskaras) done with the breath establishes a soothing rhythm and works all major muscles in the body.

 

Stress Relief

 

 

When I asked the class what it was that they wanted to get out of these classes, their response was unanimous: To learn to relax. Wow! As I started to research deeper, I found that today’s teenagers have a great amount of stress. Pressure to perform well in school, from peer and family, bullying etc. Teen rates of depression and suicide are at an all-time high all over the world.

In group yoga classes, teens meet others that have the same intent to grow stronger physically, mentally and spiritually. Calm energy begets calm energy. Synergy happens! I taught them several breathing techniques to combat stress. We did a session of chair yoga – since chairs/couches and beds are the places we spend our maximum time on. Chair yoga allows us to stretch in short bursts while at work without needing to bring out a yoga mat. Small backbends with side stretches help relieve stiffness. Folding forward and coming up in ragdoll helps calm the nervous system. We move from Fight-Flight to Rest-Relax.

 

Authenticity

 

 

Yoga teaches teens to be themselves. To develop the deep wisdom that they can be authentic, without needing to toe the “popular” line. It teaches kids to have the confidence in themselves to say “no” to something they don’t want to participate in. It helps them cultivate honesty and being true to what they believe in. To be themselves, is to also be vulnerable. And to know that it is perfectly okay to show signs of weakness, or to reach out for help when they need it.

We talked about their greatest fears as they step into the next phase in life. Worries of how college life will be in person after a pandemic. Stress on how they will manage without their dear friends or family around. Trepidation on what their future holds and whether they have made the right decisions. We talked about speaking their truth quietly and clearly and standing up for themselves and for others that couldn’t stand up for themselves.

 

Gratitude

 

 

Practicing small moments of gratitude allows for teens to recognize all the blessings that they are endowed with. In this day and age of high competitiveness, materialism, obsessive consumerism and “more is less” syndrome, it is important to remind ourselves on all the small things to be grateful for.

Every class ended with a short pause to reflect on what each of them were grateful for. It allowed the teacher also to reflect on how grateful she was that she was making a difference, however small, in the lives of these teens.

 

What the Students and Parents Had to Say about this Teen Yoga Program:

 

 

Breathwork in Daily Life

“I haven’t really taken a yoga class before. Just done some stretches or poses and then would think, “yeah this yoga thing is pretty easy.” Taking the class with Ms. Malathy completely flipped that image. I learned that having to concentrate while keeping my focus and then maintaining a breathing pattern was extremely difficult. Yet, I’d always leave class feeling energized. I was able to carry on what I learned from the class on to other things I did in daily life. Like maintaining my breathing at a constant rhythm while jogging, which actually helped me save stamina. Within a few classes, I saw a lot of improvement in how much I could stretch and my flexibility. Ms. Malathy listens to any problems you have during class and does her best to make it more comfortable. I have to say that I’ve enjoyed the class and learned a lot.”

Thank you Parth for these wonderful words!

 

“Yoga for Life”

“Through high school years, I observed my son go through peaks and valleys of stress trying to juggle between academics, extra-curricular activities, job and family time. Knowing the benefits of yoga, as a mom, I really wanted him to try it so he could learn techniques to calm down and manage stress and pressure. After college admissions this summer, he agreed to try it out along with a group of friends.

I have known Malathy for some years and have always been inspired by her passion for yoga, knowledge of in-house vegetable growing and focus on healthy eating and good health. Her energy is contagious, and her bright smile and enthusiasm always takes me to a level of positivity that cannot be described in words. Having seen her FB posts mentioning summer classes for kids, I wanted her to instill the same in my Teenager and reached out to her to conduct some sessions for my son and his 3 friends. She immediately jumped on to take up the challenge!!

She designed the sessions after understanding each teenager’s personality and background. I was impressed with how she had a theme for each class focusing on topics very relevant to their age like focus, confidence, kindness and sympathy.  I remember waking up my son who walked out of the door feeling sleepy and coming back full of energy.

Her classes helped them acknowledge what they are grateful for along with techniques to recognize and manage stress as they venture into the outside world.

As a Teenager’s Mom I truly appreciate everything Malathy has done for my son by introducing him into the path of the Yoga and encourage other Teenager Moms to try her classes. Don’t be surprised if your teenager comes back completely hooked up to “Yoga for life” 😊”

Shilpa – thank you for your (blind) trust in me. I am deeply honored.

 

Elevated Minds

“I am glad boys enjoyed your class, in fact we all moms are excited and impressed by our boys’ feedback. To be honest we had mixed opinion of their continuing of class. To our surprise they themselves offered to continue. Your classes have definitely elevated their mind and have given energy to character. I can feel that change in my boys. Parth and Akshar are fortunate to attend classes from you. I wish they could have attended few more classes. Thanks & keep up with your good work.”

The pleasure was entirely mine, Anjana.

 

What Teaching Teen Yoga Taught ME

 

 

Every relationship is a quid pro quo. Here are some valuable life lessons I garnered from this experience:

 

1. Self Doubt:

These teen yoga sessions taught me to stop doubting myself. When this proposal came to me, I went through several rounds of “should I refuse?”, “what if they hate my class?” fear trips. FEAR has two meanings: Forget Everything And Run OR Face Everything And Rise. The choice is ours.

 

2. Challenges:

I had to take up challenges that would take me into deeper waters than I cared to tread. Never having taught this age group of young men, and never having met them before, and doing these classes in person for the first time since the pandemic were all dauting challenges for me.

 

3. Stereotypes:

I had to let go of stereotypes. I thought of most teens as lazy, disinterested, disrespectful, inattentive, entitled and so on. They were anything but! They were polite, attentive, sportive, humble and funny. Phew!

 

4.  Change:

I had to be mentally prepared to change plans on the fly. One day, I had planned to teach a high energy session. When the boys came to class, they said they had a late night and were exhausted. I had to immediately improvise and create a Yin class followed by Yoga Nidra with a visualization appropriate for teens. One of the young men fell asleep and hastily woke up after class was dismissed. They all nodded their silent approval to the gentle, meditative quality of the class.

 

5. Being Authentic:

The teen yoga sessions taught me to be authentic to myself. I scoured tons of websites for information on teen yoga. Most dealt with inner city kids that had behavior problems. Or those that came from abusive homes. One fellow yogi told me to “be strict with them and keep them disciplined”. At the end of the day, I had to rely on my inner wisdom and go with what my gut told me.

 

6. To go Easy:

On the side of humor, I’ve realized that it takes a LOT of sweaty yoga to get teens to take their socks off! And 11 AM is NOT a great time to have a yoga class during summer break (well, 75 jumping jacks always woke them up)!

 

 

Acknowledgements/Credits

 

Photo credits go to Gagan Maur – a friend, my yoga student, a certified holistic nutritionist and a go-to when I need decent pictures. He can never say no when I ask, and for that, I am truly grateful. Read his wonderful blog about the Ancient Wisdom of Fermentation.

My huge thank you to all the moms (and the supportive dads) – Rupalatha, Shilpa and Anjana who stood solidly behind their boys.

Thanks, Parth and Akshar for obliging to get photographed. It is not easy for teens to allow someone to blog about them, doing some “uncool” thing called yoga. And thanks to Ved and Shreyas for having the authenticity to say “no” to being photographed. 🙂

 

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